Prt 3 of 3: Sex and Anxiety...The intimate part of anxiety that no one is talking about...

Updated: Jul 9

RX: Sex Therapy

In the final part of this blog series, let’s look at some more ways we can connect with our partner, ways to improve our body image, and the health benefits of sex. Sex can be a healthy way to release anxious energy and connect with ourselves and our partner.

Play Time:

No shame in the playing game. Masturbation and foreplay are healthy parts of self-care and connecting with our partner. Masturbation not only releases the “happy hormones” (more on that later…), but it also helps you learn about your body. Discover what you like and what works for you and communicate that to your partner for a more satisfying and intense experience. An article in Psychology Today suggests masturbation can help body image, increase the ability to have orgasms, reducing stress, and improve relationships and sexual satisfaction.

Foreplay helps strengthen intimacy and helps relax the mind and body. It helps build that desire and anticipation. Taking warm baths or hot soapy showers together, oral sex, sensory play, and massages can help you and your partner feel connected and keep that bond strong. Communicate with your partner about what you like and why you like it.

Sex with Benefits:

There are quite a number of ways sex can help with anxiety.

· Practice mindfulness: If you find yourself getting distracted during sex, redirect your attention to the physical sensation you are experiencing.

· Releases the “happy hormones”: Hormones like dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin are released during arousal and intimacy. Dopamine helps us feel pleasure and desire. Endorphins are natural stress relievers and mood-boosting hormones. Oxytocin is released during orgasm and is related to its intensity and helps us to feel positive emotions and relaxation. These all play a part in increasing trust, intimacy, and satisfaction.

· Good for our health by:

1) Boosting the immune system- Stress and anxiety can actually lower the immune system

2) Stimulating estrogen and testosterone- Regular activity releases estrogen and testosterone promoting better skin

3) Keeping the heart healthy- can play a role in lowering blood pressure, and lowers the risk of cardiovascular diseases

4) Counting as exercise…sort of- You may not burn as many calories (about 85 calories for 30 minutes), but it is definitely more fun than the gym

· Promotes better sleep: The hormone prolactin is released during orgasm which helps you feel relaxed and sleepy

Image is everything…

Body image that is. How we look at ourselves, how we feel about our body, the way that we talk to ourselves, and to our body is critical in self-love, self-care, and our relationships. Think about how you respond when someone pays you a compliment. Do you brush it off, make a joke because you feel uncomfortable? Do you come back with a negative response? Or do you confidently say, “Thank you!”.

It wasn’t until my early 30’s, during my self-help journey, that I realized I couldn’t accept a compliment without making a joke about it because I felt uncomfortable. I felt uncomfortable in my own skin and to have someone else acknowledge me was difficult. Once I realized this, I began to make a conscious effort to respond with a smile and “thank you!”, even if I didn’t believe it. It did take a while, but now, because I worked on my body image and self-love, I can happily, and confidently accept a compliment.

Awareness is the first step to changing your body image. Journal what you love about yourself and your body and then journal what you don’t like. Go into this with love and curiosity instead of criticism and judgment. When did these feelings begin? What was the story you were told growing up? How did your home, culture, social circle, play a role in these beliefs? Allow your thoughts and feelings to be just that…thoughts and feelings. Let them come and go without attachment.

Changing the narrative:

Once you have acknowledged the way you self-talk, now you can change the narrative. What if you turned the, “I have to go on a diet” to “I get to eat healthier foods for my body” or “I have to lose xx pounds” to “I get to exercise and work on my ideal weight so I can feel and look even better”.

Write down some of the things you say to yourself then work them into a positive. You will feel so much better when you do.

To quote Robin Sharma; “The mind is a wonderful servant, but a terrible master.”


This series was an example of how The Power of 3 works to bring us success and create a fulfilling and happier life.

We successfully Identified key challenges within anxiety and how it can affect our sex life. We learned tools and some ideas to Integrate into our life. And we learned how to Release thoughts, limiting beliefs to reclaim our power and bring us closer to our partner.

Contact me for your free sample session. Book your appointment on the BOOK NOW page.

Disclaimer: Information provided in this article is meant to be for informational purposes only and not meant to diagnose or serve as a substitute for medical treatment. If you or your partner are experiencing any of these symptoms, contact your healthcare professional


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